An emperor who kissed everyone, like Caligula and his infamous kiss with the player Mnester, were seen as unruly and disrespectful to their station. Kissing also features in the Old Testament. Cheek kissing in Turkey is also widely accepted. The Hebrew word for kiss is “nashay,” which means to literally or figuratively touch something. While cheek kissing is a common greeting in many cultures, each country has a unique way of kissing. Roman kisses fulfilled purposes from the political and legal to the social and sexual. “The right place to kiss is a … In his new book One Kiss or Two: In Search of the Perfect Greeting, career diplomat Andy Scott speculates on the origins of the cheek-kissing tradition: “In his Epistle to the Romans, St. Paul instructed followers to ‘salute one another with a holy kiss.’ And so the ‘holy kiss’ became a common greeting among early Christians and a central part of Catholic ceremony.”Over time, it’s possible that the biblical lip-to-lip salutation evolved in… Please feel free to ask me anything about Latin Grammar, Syntax, or the Ancient World. Outside of the Church, kissing was used to cement rank and social order, for example, subjects and vassals kissed the robe of the king, or the ring or slippers of the pope. Neel Burton, M.D., is a psychiatrist, philosopher, and writer who lives and teaches in Oxford, England. Only the user who asked this question will see who disagreed with this answer. Under the Romans, kissing became more widespread. Cheek kissing is more of a social gesture than anything. Although kisses within the family were, of course, seen as platonic there still seemed to be concern about sullying a young girl’s reputation with an inappropriate kiss from, perhaps, a distant family member. The kiss of greeting was perhaps the most common form of kissing, if only because an Ancient Roman might meet many family members, friends, equals, and partners in business in a day. In the mafia movies, we all see the dons kissing on the cheek before the commencement of a meeting or an execution. There is no religious obligation to kiss a holy object, however Jews believe kissing displays veneration and devotion to Judaism and loyalty to God. Prevalent in Europe, Latin America, the Mediterranean, the Middle East, and the horn of Africa, kissing on cheeks to say hello is a very global phenomenon. Who’ll see your beauty?/ Who now will you love? Kissing is an important action in Judaism, and is a widespread practice among Jews. LATIN AMERICA: In this part of the world, cheek kissing is a universal form of greeting between a man and a woman or two women. Is it like in Spain where you kiss each other's cheek twice? For the Ancient Romans, one method of displaying affection that we recognize as well is the act of kissing. The Ancient Romans, no strangers to intimacy, might have had some interesting cultural rules for kissing, but it is but another window into seeing the daily life, concerns, thoughts, and joys of an Ancient Roman’s life. Katia Loisel, a body language and kissing expert and spokesperson for the dating site … Three kisses are shared as a greeting in Belgium, Ukraine, Serbia, Montenegro, Macedonia, Slovenia, the Netherlands and Switzerland. In Homer, which dates back to the 9th century BCE, King Priam of Troy memorably kisses Achilles’ hand to plead for the return of his son’s cadaver: Fear, O Achilles, the wrath of heaven; think on your own father and have compassion upon me, who am the more pitiable, for I have steeled myself as no man yet has ever steeled himself before me, and have raised to my lips the hand of him who slew my son. With my business accomplished, ah, then shall only one temple. In Search of The Perfect Greeting, diplomat Andy Scott points out that the kiss greeting is often found in heavily Catholic cultures like that of Italy, Spain and Latin America. SPACE ON THE FACE? In one of the stranger chapters of Plutarch’s Roman Questions he answered the question, “Why do the women kiss their kinsmen on the lips?” This, indeed, must have been a question for anyone on the outside of Roman culture. In fact, the Ancient Romans were fascinated with and, perhaps, fixated on the kiss or oscula. However, a kiss on the cheek is normally not intimate at all. Drive on the right, kiss on the left. AMOR’s temple alone, take the initiate in. Terracotta figurine made in Tarsus, Roman Era. For the kiss to be socially acceptable the two have to be of the same “propinqui” in a broad sense. PHILIPPINES: Cheek kissing or beso is a common greeting. It was also a sign of closeness between masters or teachers and their pupils, though there were times in history when this was discouraged because of the ambiguous nature of kisses and appropriate intimacy between masters and pupils. Lips have the most nerve endings or all parts of the body after fingers, toes, and of course genitals. It wasn’t exactly as friendly as you think. Cheek kissing is probably the most innocent form of kissing there is out there. Courtesy of Wikimedia Commons. Habits changed with the decline of Rome and the rise of Christianity. So the question I believe is not so much why did society adopt kissing, but rather what taboos so successfully suppressed the act. It is also exceedingly ill-suited during the coronavirus pandemic. The kiss of greeting was perhaps the most common form of kissing, if only because an Ancient Roman might meet many family members, friends, equals, and partners in business in a day. Behaving Appropriately when Meeting Someone Expect personal questions. I know there are italian immigrant communities but I mean among the anglo-saxon origin australians? Whatever the case, kissing behaviour is not unique to human beings. La bise is an exchange of kisses on the cheek and the traditional greeting in France. The Latin anima means both "breath of air" and "soul", and, like animus [mind], derives from the Proto-Indo-European root ane- [to breathe, blow]. The second debate relates to the cheek that should be presented first for a kiss. In other words, a kiss on the cheek, in this case, means they are in accord. How do people in Norway greet each other? Get the help you need from a therapist near you–a FREE service from Psychology Today. Italy: One kiss on each cheek. Although the “kiss of peace” and “kiss of charity” and “Judas kiss” were initially acceptable between men and women and the greeting kiss for widowed women were a sign of respect. With February starting up some of us might be thinking about that infamous day of love, St. Valentines Day. Kissing Each Cheek — The Origins of The Double Kiss May Surprise You. The content of this field is kept private and will not be shown publicly. In the Histories, which date back to the 5th century BCE, Herodotus speaks of kissing among the Persians, who greeted men of equal rank with a kiss … This is a type of kiss that you should never do in front of your parents. Vedic texts from ancient India seem to talk about kissing, and the Kama Sutra, which probably dates back to the 2nd century, devotes an entire chapter to modes of kissing. Today, locking lips openly in some parts of India is considered indecent and could net you jail time. The people who could touch an Emperor’s lips was a highly watched and judged list of citizens. Some anthropologists have suggested that the Greeks learnt about erotic kissing from the Indians when Alexander the Great invaded India in 326 BCE. Also known as a … © 2020 Transparent Language, Inc. All Rights Reserved. 07-23-2013, 05:23 PM minibrings : 9,336 posts, read 20,063,265 times Reputation: 4494. The really huge myth is that all women like it, wrong! In only some cases would a family friend be allowed to kiss the children of a family. French Kiss. Lucius Paulus once wrote about the joy of returning home to his children and how they would “race to win the first kisses”. Homer, Iliad, Bk. Couples got married by kissing in front of a gathered assembly, a Roman practice that has survived to this day. But despite being a part of everyday life in France, la bise can be complicated. Kissing the cheek is a very common form of greeting in Southern Europe and Latin America. In Argentina you’ll get both a hug and a cheek kiss no matter who you are. Typically, emperors, like other Romans, could kiss and be kissed by family members. One reason Plutarch provide might be so that the male relatives can detect whether or not their female relatives have been drinking wine when it was forbidden to them. One scandalous story was Agrippina’s use of her right to “ius osculi” with her uncle, the emperor Claudius, to remain close to him and seduce him. Hello There! As we look at how Ancient Romans used their lips to communicate different sentiments in different situations, it can make us begin to question our own cultural code of conduct around kissing. A family shares a kiss near Pushkar in Rajasthan, India. The cheek kiss is fundamental to greetings among friends, colleagues and even national leaders in many countries in Europe. Here's how you can make most of each minute.… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…, New book! 24. Samuel Butler. This rule was not to be broken or followed incorrectly. Although St Peter had spoken of the "kiss of charity", and St Paul of the "holy kiss", early church sects omitted kissing on Maundy Thursday, the day of the year on which Judas betrayed Jesus with a kiss. OK. Cheek kisses are predominantly from women to everyone else, and fro… I'm a clean freak and found someone who doesn't like it either. In fact, it was the Ancient Rome breathalyzer test! The kisses are accompanied by a handshake or by putting one’s hands on the other person’s shoulders. Is it a ritualized form of ancestral behavior, like sniffing each other for recognition, or is it an emotional one arising from childhood? Every culture in any point of time has its own language of love. They distinguished a kiss on the hand or cheek (osculum) from a kiss on the lips (basium) and a deep or passionate kiss (savolium). Oscillum (clay disk with relief decoration) depicting a couple kissing. Advanced English learners - improve your listening and reading skills with authentic sources and normally-paced spe… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…, 'I speak Italian with a Croydon accent': reporters on their language skills theguardian.com/membership/202…, Only have 10 minutes to devote to language learning today? The Transformative Power of Engaging in Ritual, Need to Know: How Curiosity Drives Risky Behavior. It was common for friends to kiss each others’ eyes or necks (and the mouths). Ritual pucker, it’s placed upon the cheek when first meeting, or when greeting friends and family again. Why are so many people drawn to conspiracy theories in times of crisis? Whose will they say you’ll be?/ Who will you kiss? That The fate of the star-crossed lovers reminds us that such carefree abandon is not without risks, and it could be that vampirism evolved as a representation of the dangers—to health, rank, reputation, prospects, and happiness—of kissing the wrong person. The French don’t have a monopoly on greeting with a kiss, of course. It was also customary to kiss the necks of your parents or grandparents. Trans. Early Christians often greeted one another with a "holy kiss", which was believed to lead to a transfer of spirit. See a translation Report copyright infringement; Answers When you "disagree" with an answer. World would not be the world, Rome would cease to be Rome. Kissing, however, would ultimately more discouraged than it was in the rest of Roman society, in case it awoke any carnal desires. For those of us expats living abroad that come from a country that isn’t used to kissing on cheeks to say hello, then this custom can be seen as awkward when you first do the cheek kiss. This likely came from St. Paul … 3, On Kissing. Whether or not we are looking forward to it, forgetting it, or ignoring it, let us take a look at one of the romantic activities that fascinated the Ancient Romans. Family members would kiss when meeting, brothers, friends, and even boxers and wrestlers would touch lips. Cheek kissing is a ritual or social kissing gesture to indicate friendship, family relationship, perform a greeting, to confer congratulations, to comfort someone, to show respect. Haptic gesture, the cheek kiss (or air kiss) is not universally practiced. The Best Way to Deal with the Selfish People in Your Life, 3 Reasons Why Being Single Is the New "Finding the One", Psychology Today © 2020 Sussex Publishers, LLC, 4 New Findings about the Hidden World of Racial Bias, Adverse Childhood Experiences: Why Cortisol Responses Matter, Heaven and Hell: The Psychology of the Emotions, Kissing: Reflections on Humans and Other Animals Making Out, New Psychology of Kissing Reveals Its True Purpose, Why One Partner's Sexual Satifaction Is Much More Important Than the Other's. However, an emperor that kissed no one was seen as strange and cold. A few intimate friends would be allowed to kiss the emperor, as well, but only a few. Roman poets such as Ovid and Catullus celebrated kissing, as, for example, in Catullus 8: Goodbye girl, now Catullus is firm,/ He doesn’t search for you, won’t ask unwillingly./ But you’ll grieve, when nobody asks./ Woe to you, wicked girl, what life’s left for you?/ Who’ll submit to you now? Rome, thou art a whole world, it is true, and yet without love this. When there was a contagious disease making its way across the city kissing was something considered so prevalent that measures would be taken to forbid kissing between aristocrats until the sickness passed. However, there was one family relative that was not to be kissed: the grown, marriageable girl. One of the very clear rules about kissing was that it was a privilege to greet members of your family group with a kiss. It was a show of gratitude, reinforced friendship, and was an appropriate display of “salutatio” between clients and patrons. But this need not mean that erotic kissing originated in India, or indeed that it does not predate the oral roots of the Vedic texts. Thank you! The greeting kiss is a Miami move. The cheek kiss hello. He also reports that, because the Greeks ate of the cow, which was sacred to the Egyptians, the Egyptians refused to kiss them on the mouth. I never liked kissing, and I know others who don't either, but we are made to feel like freaks , especially in the US. It’s also the customary greeting in the following countries: Spain: One kiss on each cheek. Sometimes, only the cheeks make contact, and the kiss is sent floating in the air. In Russia, Poland, Slovenia, Serbia, Macedonia, Montenegro, the Netherlands, Iran and Egypt it is customary to "kiss three times, on alternate cheeks", but kiss twice in Bosnia and Herzegovina. Primates such as Bonobo apes frequently kiss one another; dogs and cats lick and nuzzle one another and members of other species; even snails and insects engage in antennal play. [6] Disguised as Esau, Jacob steals his brother’s blessing by kissing their blind father Isaac. Knowing which cheek to start with is a crucial lesson that can prevent future accidental lip-to-lip action with strangers. As Christianity took root in Ancient Rome, the act of kissing became even more ambiguous. Think too hard about it and the act of kissing and its history is rather mysterious and strange. In this case, a kiss on the cheek might mean complicity. Sometimes both cheeks are kissed; sometimes only one cheek is touched lightly by the lips. It could be that, rather than kissing, these animals are in fact grooming, smelling, or communicating with one another, but even so, their behaviour implies and strengthens trust and bonding. After the fall of Rome, the romantic kiss seems to have disappeared for several hundred years, only to re-emerge at the end of the eleventh century with the rise of courtly love. Greek culture is largely … Source: 2. This suggests that it is not innate or intuitive, as it so often seems to us. “Children and Everyday Life in the Roman and Late Antique World” by Christian Laes, Ville Vuolanto, Routledge (2010). In France, it’s customary to greet someone with a kiss—two in fact, starting from the left cheek (although regional variations exist). Whose lips will you bite?/ But you, Catullus, be resolved to be firm. Quote: Originally Posted by Docman. Overall, though, Plutarch leaves the impression that a kiss between family members was simply a token of kinship. Vātsyāyana, Kama Sutra, Part 2 Ch. Yet, there are some present-day indigenous cultures that practise kiss feeding but not social kissing. Such as in the case of Frontos, Marcus Aurelius’ master, who kissed the hands and feet and Marcus Aurelius’ baby daughters. The status of a Roman citizen determined the part of the body on which he or she could kiss the emperor, from cheek to foot. "Bilingualism for All? In the Song of Songs, which celebrates sexual love, one of the lovers implores, ‘Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth, for thy love is better than wine.’. Terracotta figurine made in Tarsus, Roman Era. The Wrist Kiss. You may not know the origin of kissing each cheek as a greeting. This is one of the more unusual types of kiss and is surprising to receive. Courtesy of WIkimedia Commons. Perhaps strange to us, it was common for Ancient Romans to kiss closed eyelids and the side of necks. This is not something we haven’t seen before, but it was something that was not limited to lovers. In the Histories, which date back to the 5th century BCE, Herodotus speaks of kissing among the Persians, who greeted men of equal rank with a kiss on the mouth and those of slightly lower rank with a kiss on the cheek. We know, of course, that kissing was an act between lovers, as it almost exclusively is today, but there were many other situations where a kiss was no only socially acceptable but recommendable. There’s no consensus amo… One possibility is that kissing is a learnt behaviour that evolved from "kiss feeding", the process by which mothers in some cultures feed their babies by passing masticated food from mouth-to-mouth. Please check your inbox for your confirmation email. The Ancient Romans had some pretty interesting customs and laws that were related to wine. Possibly the friendliest place in the world you might want to go to be greeted! Today, a swift kiss on the cheek known in French as “la bise,” is a standard greeting in much of the world. Ancient Romans probably had very little regard for personal space since one way that social equals, usually those we would consider aristocrats, would greet each other on a daily basis would be with a kiss. Cheek Kissing. : Raciolinguistic Perspectives on Dual Language Education in the United States" edi… twitter.com/i/web/status/1… Retweeted by Transparent Language, The last speakers of ancient Sparta bbc.com/travel/story/2… via @BBC_Travel. The owner of it will not be notified. Or, kissing could be a culturally determined form of grooming behaviour, or, at least in the case of deep or erotic kissing, a representation, substitute for, and complement to penetrative intercourse. It goes right next to the forehead kiss, but even the forehead kiss has a more intimate vibe to it than a kiss on the cheek does. When there was a contagious disease making its way across the city kissing was something considered so prevalent that measures would be taken to forbid kissing between aristocrats until the sickness passed. This is even true of business meetings once the initial introductions have been made. Its origin is unknown, though there are many theories. Like the … Butterfly kiss. Kissing is not universal among human beings and, even today, there are some cultures that have no place for it. CHEEK NEVER MOUTH. We talked about greeting someone with a cheek kiss, but I failed to mention that you also give la bise when leaving if you are on kissing terms with someone. First things first, while many Anglo-Saxons believe that kissing as a greeting is unique to France, the practice is common in a wide range of European and Latin countries, as well as Russia and certain Arabic and sub-Saharan nations. In his new book One Kiss or Two: In Search of the Perfect Greeting, career diplomat Andy Scott speculates on the origins of the cheek-kissing tradition: “In his Epistle to the Romans, St. Paul instructed followers to ‘salute one another with a holy kiss.’ And so the ‘holy kiss’ became a common greeting among early Christians and a central part of Catholic ceremony.” While “bise” translates to “kiss”, it’s not actually a kiss. As a general rule in France, you should start the cheek kissing on the opposite side of the face as cars drive on the road – kiss their left cheek. Be it platonic, familial, or romantic love every culture has a code of conduct and a shared understanding of how to exist in the personal space of loved ones. In an age of widespread illiteracy, kisses served to seal agreements—hence the expression ‘to seal with a kiss’ and the ‘X’ on the dotted line. Even though the kiss may have originated on the subcontinent, its practice has traditionally been regarded by Indians as a private matter meant for the bedroom. Apparently, the kiss on the cheek has a significance which is, yep, you guessed right – complicity. A brush of lips to cheek is an acceptable greeting around the world—even among Communist leaders. Neel Burton is author of Heaven and Hell: The Psychology of the Emotions, For Better For Worse, and other books. For example: If you are at a person’s house, you do la bise upon entering and to everyone in the house and then again when you leave to … It’s something most French people engage in at least once or twice a day, whether with family or friends, or with colleagues. But, it is important to note that the Philippine cheek kiss is a cheek-to-cheek kiss, NOT a lips-to-cheek kiss. Oscillum (clay disk with relief decoration) depicting a couple kissing. And depending on the region you’re visiting, in Brazil you might get cheek-kissed up to three times—by anyone! The origin of kiss-greeting are almost lost in a faraway ancestral past, but there's agreement among the experts that the Romans were the ones who made it popular and exported the ritual across Europe. The kiss of Romeo and Juliet is emblematic of this movement, which sought to remove courtship from the purview of family and society and celebrate romantic love as a liberating, self-determining, and potentially subversive force. The History of Kissing: The Ancient Roman Fascination, One to a Million in Latin and Roman Numerals, Smells Life Teen Spirit: Latin Edition II. Cheek kissing is a fairly universal form of greeting in most Latin American countries. Salvete Omnes! The Romans kissed their partners or lovers, family and friends, and rulers.